after the long night of unconscious searching,
after sleep-filled hands roam
through fields of bedsheets
searching,
I wake up to see the familiar sight of your back
it's funny how such a simple act feels like
so much more.
a living metaphor
laying next to me
you know, a few months ago I changed the side of the bed I sleep on
nothing changed.
your back always facing me;
half expecting the folds of your shirt to form eyes
shadows crawling over them to be their eyelids
taunting
taunting
biting my blood-stained lips
I hold myself back from
grabbing your shoulder
pushing you on your back, hands in your curls to scream
look at me. look at me. look at me.
I shut out the sun
I shut out the birds for you
look at me.
my teeth could sink into my wrist
make a waterfall out of me, I'd whisper
let me pour myself into you
let my blood dilute the whites of your eyes
please.
wrap your lips around my veins and suck,
love me until I'm gone
love me after too
love me. love me. fucking look at me
6 April 2024